Love IS BEARING WITH ONE ANOTHER
Before I got married I had a kitchen tea and a hens weekend away with my female friends and my sister asked each of my friends to write some words of advice in a special book. My lovely sister in law to be wrote 2 words - Love and tolerance. She said that that had been the secret to her successful marriage for so many years and were 2 words of advice someone else had given to her. Love and Tolerance.
Put up with others.
Bear with one another.
Tolerate others.
Live through it without commenting, complaining, reacting, interfering.
When I chose to marry Brad, I knew I would have to love and tolerate things about him, even though he was the one whom I loved and had chosen to spend my life with. No one is perfect, we all do things that are annoying and we all sin. We will all need to bear with one another sometimes, no matter how fond of each other we are.
I know that when I was a kid, we were not taught about tolerance and it is much more common to talk about. We are told to put up with others who are different to us, who do different things and who act in a different way. We think people are weird and strange if they are different to us but we are actually all different and all have our own strange things we do.
What do you think?
What are some of the strangest things that you do? Here are some of the things I have seen and heard about that I’ve thought of and I wonder if this is you?
Do you:
Bite your nails and spit the little bits on the carpet?
Chant the same line of a chant or song over and over?
Burp or fart really loudly?
Take all your clothes off when going to the toilet to do a number 2 because you didn’t want it to make your clothes smelly.
Eat snails from the garden.
Or are you thinking of something else that happens in your family that is crazy and strange and unique but you just have to bear with it?
God has made us all to be different and we all think differently to one another. This doesn’t mean that some of us are better than others. It doesn’t mean that some of us are worse than others.
Bible Passage: Galatians 3:28
“Faith in Christ Jesus is what makes each of you equal with each other, whether you are a Jew or a Greek, a slave or a free person, a man or a woman.”
Because we are different, with different thoughts and opinions, we might struggle to see eye to eye. We might struggle to get along. Paul wants us to put up with each other.
Bible Passage: Colossians 3:12-14
“God loves you and has chosen you as his own special people. So be gentle, kind, humble, meek, and patient. Put up with each other, and forgive anyone who does you wrong, just as Christ has forgiven you. Love is more important than anything else. It is what ties everything completely together.”
You can see why I thought a whole term would be a good for the topic of love! Maybe 10 weeks isn’t even enough. Love is more important than anything else. It is what ties everything completely together.
Story Time!
Sharni had a tough time in lockdown in Sydney last year. We were in lockdown and away from school for 17 weeks. We linked Sharni up with her friends online and she spent a few wonderful weeks playing and chatting with her friends on her iPad.
After a few good weeks, Sharni found that her friends weren’t answering her calls and they weren’t calling her. It seemed like they were all chatting and playing together without her. We tried to think of some conclusions. Maybe they were busy. Maybe they were all playing a game without her. Maybe it was an accident.
As she was playing a game, she stumbled across her friends online together and a comment came up “lose her.”
Sharni was devastated. She loved her friends. They were nice and fun. One of them might have convinced them to leave Sharni out. What was the way forward?
How can Sharni put up with her friends when they are treating her so badly?
A few weeks after that, everything went back to normal and Sharni was playing with the girls again. What had happened? How can Sharni go back to them when they were so mean?
I personally encouraged Sharni to find some new friends, but Sharni really liked the ones she had. She forgave them even though they had not confessed or apologised. She put up with them, knowing that we all stuff up in our actions sometimes.
I’m not saying to put up with being constantly abused and bullied. Sharni didn’t have to subject herself to that treatment, and if it was ongoing I would strongly advise her to get out of there!!!
But for things that are a minor bit annoying, we need to do what Paul says and put up with each other, and forgive anyone who does you wrong, just as Christ has forgiven you.
Question Time!
What is something that you do that your family have to put up with?
What is something that your friends and family do that you struggle to put up with?
Do you have any tips or tricks that you use that you can share now that help you to not react to annoyances?